Section 1: Analysis & Insights

Executive Summary

Raising Body Positive Teens provides parents with a comprehensive guide to helping their adolescents develop healthy relationships with food, movement, and their bodies. Written by three experts—a therapist, a dietitian, and an adolescent medicine physician—the book challenges diet culture and offers evidence-based alternatives that prioritize well-being over weight. The authors present a weight-neutral approach that emphasizes intuitive eating, joyful movement, adequate sleep, and critical media consumption. They provide practical tools like the Hunger Meter, Tech Meter, and boundary-setting exercises that families can implement immediately. The book addresses the unique challenges of raising teens in the digital age while acknowledging the impact of cultural messages about food and body image.

Structural Overview

The book is organized into 11 chapters that build progressively from foundational concepts to practical applications:

1. You Made It Through Puberty, and Your Teen Will, Too! - Normalizes adolescent development and explains physical changes
2. Learning Our Stress System - Explains the physiology of stress and its impact on eating
3. Wake-up Call - Comprehensive guide to sleep needs and hygiene
4. The Young and the Restless - Addresses joyful movement vs. exercise as punishment
5. Diet-free Parenting - Core philosophy of feeding without restriction or pressure
6. The Hunger Meter - Practical tool for understanding hunger and fullness cues
7. Ingredients for Building a Peaceful Relationship with Food - Nutrition basics without diet culture
8. Diet-free Meal Prep for the Family - Practical meal and snack ideas
9. The Benefits of Boundaries - Framework for setting healthy boundaries
10. Under the Influence of Social Media - Navigating technology and media critically
11. Building a Friendship with Your Body - Strategies for improving body image

Each chapter includes reflective exercises and explorations designed to help parents examine their own beliefs and behaviors while learning to support their teens.

Deep Insights Analysis

The Problem with Diet Culture

The authors identify diet culture as a pervasive force that harms teens by promoting weight loss as the primary marker of health. They cite research showing that dieting is the biggest predictor of eating disorders and that eating disorder rates doubled during the era of public health campaigns focused on the "obesity epidemic." The book challenges the fundamental premise that weight equals health, presenting evidence that weight-inclusive approaches produce better physical and emotional health outcomes than weight-focused approaches.

Puberty as a Critical Window

The authors emphasize that adolescence is a unique developmental period with specific nutritional needs. Teens gain significant weight during puberty as part of normal development—this weight gain is necessary for bone density, muscle growth, and brain development. Peak bone mass is achieved by late adolescence, and inadequate nutrition during this window can have lifelong consequences. The book explains that 60% of the brain is adipose tissue, making fat essential for basic bodily functions.

The Satter Division of Responsibility in Feeding

A central framework in the book is Ellyn Satter's Division of Responsibility in Feeding (sDOR): parents decide when food is served and what is offered; children decide whether to eat and how much. This approach provides structure without pressure, allowing teens to develop internal regulation. The authors explain that externally imposed restriction leads to sneaking food, hoarding, and overeating outside the home, while too much freedom (no structure) also backfires.

The Physiology of Stress and Eating

The book provides accessible explanations of the autonomic nervous system, explaining how the sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight) and parasympathetic nervous system (relaxation) affect eating behaviors. When stressed, people may eat mindlessly, override hunger cues, or lose appetite entirely. The authors teach breathing techniques to engage the relaxation response, noting that deep, slow, rhythmic breathing can shift the nervous system from stress to calm.

Sleep as a Foundational Pillar

The authors present compelling evidence about sleep's importance: teens need close to nine hours per night but average closer to six. Sleep deprivation affects mood, academic performance, athletic performance, immune function, and hunger/satiety hormones. The book explains that teens' circadian rhythms shift during adolescence, making them naturally tired later and wake later—a biological reality that conflicts with early school start times.

Movement Without Morality

The book challenges the morality often associated with exercise—being "good" if you've exercised and "bad" if you haven't. The authors explain that exercising to burn calories or lose weight creates an unhealthy relationship with movement. They present signs of balanced vs. unbalanced exercise and discuss Relative Energy Deficiency in Sports (RED-S), a serious condition where athletes don't fuel adequately for their activity level.

The Hunger Meter Tool

The Hunger Meter is a 10-point scale from ravenous (1) to stuffed (10), with 3-4 being the ideal range for starting to eat and 6-7 being the ideal stopping place. The tool helps teens develop interoceptive awareness—the ability to recognize internal signals like hunger and fullness. The authors explain that dieting disrupts these natural cues and that relearning them takes time and practice.

Social Media as a Double-Edged Sword

The authors acknowledge both benefits and harms of social media. Benefits include connection, support, and access to diverse perspectives. Harms include exposure to unrealistic images, fitspiration content, and constant comparison. They recommend curating feeds to include diverse bodies and interests, setting boundaries around use, and developing critical consumption skills.

Body Image as a Spectrum

Rather than framing body image as good or bad, the authors present it as a spectrum. On the negative end, body image is critical, evaluative, and distressing. On the positive end, it's confident, accepting, and secure. They explain that body image fluctuates based on mood, events, and environment, and that it can be improved through practice.

Practical Implementation

Diet-Free Parenting Assessment

The book includes a self-assessment tool with 13 statements scored from 0 (never) to 3 (always). Lower scores indicate a more peaceful relationship with food. A score of 19 or higher suggests consulting with a weight-inclusive, non-diet registered dietitian and/or therapist. This tool helps parents identify areas where diet culture may be influencing their parenting.

The Tech Meter

Similar to the Hunger Meter, the Tech Meter is a 5-point scale for assessing technology use:

• Level 1: Mindful and limited use
• Level 2: Mindful and content with expanded use
• Level 3: The slippery slope and tiring use
• Level 4: Depleting energy and excessive use
• Level 5: Give me my tech!

This tool helps teens and parents develop awareness around technology habits and make intentional choices about use.

Meal Planning Without Diet Culture

The authors provide practical meal and snack ideas organized by time of day, emphasizing balanced meals that include all food groups. They stress that variety is important for nutritional benefits and flexibility, and that all foods fit—including desserts. They recommend making foods equal in availability (not just morally equal) so that healthy choices are as accessible as less nutritious ones.

Boundary-Setting Framework

The book teaches that boundaries are about protecting values, not controlling others. They provide a values exploration exercise to help parents identify core principles, then teach communication scripts using "When you [action], I feel [feeling], and hear in my mind [thought]." They emphasize caring with detachment—being present to another's pain without taking responsibility for fixing it.

Reducing Body-Checking Behaviors

The authors define body checking as pinching, squeezing, mirror-gazing, comparing to old photos, or asking others for validation. They explain these behaviors increase depression and anxiety and recommend a 24-hour surveillance exercise to increase awareness. Strategies include using a "stop technique," removing mirrors temporarily, and redefining the narrative about one's body.

Critical Assessment

Strengths

1. Evidence-Based Approach: The book is well-researched with extensive citations to scientific studies and professional organizations.
2. Practical Tools: The Hunger Meter, Tech Meter, and various assessments provide concrete ways to implement concepts.
3. Inclusive Perspective: The book addresses diverse bodies, abilities, cultural backgrounds, and family structures.
4. Comprehensive Coverage: It addresses the interconnected topics of food, movement, sleep, stress, social media, and body image.
5. Parent-Focused: While written for parents, it acknowledges that parents must do their own work to model healthy behaviors.

Limitations

1. Cultural Assumptions: While the book acknowledges cultural diversity, some meal suggestions and examples reflect Western cultural norms.
2. Resource Access: Some recommendations (like certain foods or activities) assume financial and geographic privilege.
3. Medical System Navigation: The book acknowledges that medical professionals often give weight-focused advice but doesn't provide extensive guidance for advocating within medical settings.
4. Time Commitment: Implementing all recommendations would require significant time and energy from already-busy parents.

Assumptions

1. Parents have some degree of control over their home environment and food availability.
2. Teens are willing to engage in conversations about food, body, and social media with their parents.
3. Families have access to basic food resources, even if limited.
4. Parents are motivated to examine their own beliefs and behaviors.
5. Medical providers are open to weight-inclusive approaches (which may not always be true).

Section 2: Actionable Framework

Critical Process: Implementing Diet-Free Parenting

Purpose

To create a home environment that supports your teen in developing a peaceful relationship with food and their body, free from diet culture's harmful messages.

Prerequisites

• Willingness to examine your own beliefs about food, weight, and body image
• Basic understanding of the Division of Responsibility in Feeding
• Access to regular meal times and food resources
• Commitment to modeling the behaviors you want to see

Actionable Steps

1. Examine Your Own Relationship with Food

   • Take the Diet-Free Parenting Self-Assessment in Chapter 5
   • Identify areas where diet culture has influenced your beliefs
   • Consider your own history with dieting, body image, and food rules
   • Reflect on messages you received about food and body during your childhood

2. Establish Structure Without Pressure

   • ✓ Provide regular meals and sit-down snacks (3 meals + 1-3 snacks daily)
   • ✓ Decide when food is served and what is offered
   • ✓ Allow your teen to decide whether to eat and how much
   • ✓ Avoid commenting on how much or how little your teen eats
   • ✓ Keep the structure consistent but flexible

3. Make All Foods Equal in Availability

   • ✓ Include a variety of foods from all food groups
   • ✓ Make "treat" foods as accessible as other foods
   • ✓ Avoid labeling foods as "good" or "bad"
   • ✓ Serve desserts without requiring them to be earned
   • ✓ Keep foods that your teen enjoys readily available

4. Separate Food Talk from Weight Talk

   • ✓ Never comment on your teen's weight or body size
   • ✓ Avoid discussing your own weight loss or dieting efforts
   • ✓ Don't use food as reward or punishment
   • ✓ Refrain from moralizing food choices
   • ✓ Focus on how food makes you feel, not how it makes you look

5. Model Intuitive Eating

   • ✓ Eat regular meals yourself
   • ✓ Stop eating when you feel satisfied, not stuffed
   • ✓ Eat a variety of foods without guilt
   • ✓ Demonstrate that all foods fit
   • ✓ Show that you trust your body's signals

6. Address Your Own Food Issues

   • 🔑 If you struggle with food, seek support from a weight-inclusive professional
   • 🔑 Work on your own relationship with food before expecting your teen to have a healthy one
   • 🔑 Be honest about your struggles without burdening your teen
   • 🔑 Model that it's okay to be a work in progress
   • 🔑 Practice self-compassion around food choices

7. Handle Eating Outside the Home

   • ✓ Don't ask what your teen ate when they weren't with you
   • ✓ Trust that your teen can navigate food choices independently
   • ✓ Provide guidance when asked, not unsolicited advice
   • ✓ Focus on the overall pattern, not individual choices
   • ✓ Remember that one meal or day doesn't define health

8. Create Positive Mealtime Experiences

   • ✓ Keep conversation light and enjoyable
   • ✓ Avoid stressful topics at the table
   • ✓ Make mealtimes a time for connection
   • ✓ Allow your teen to participate in meal planning and preparation
   • ✓ Respect your teen's food preferences while offering variety

Critical Process: Teaching the Hunger Meter

Purpose

To help your teen develop interoceptive awareness and learn to eat in response to their body's wisdom rather than external rules or emotions.

Prerequisites

• Understanding of the 10-point Hunger Meter scale
• Regular opportunities to eat throughout the day
• Willingness to allow your teen to make their own food decisions
• Patience as your teen learns to recognize internal cues

Actionable Steps

1. Introduce the Hunger Meter Scale

   • ✓ Explain the 10-point scale from ravenous (1) to stuffed (10)
   • ✓ Describe each level with concrete examples
   • ✓ Emphasize that 3-4 is the ideal starting range
   • ✓ Explain that 6-7 is the ideal stopping place
   • ✓ Normalize that all levels are experiences everyone has

2. Practice Identifying Hunger Levels

   • ✓ Ask your teen where they are on the scale before meals
   • ✓ Share your own hunger level to model the practice
   • ✓ Discuss physical sensations associated with different levels
   • ✓ Notice patterns in when hunger gets too high or too low
   • ✓ Use the 3 Ts (taste, texture, temperature) to guide food choices at level 3

3. Practice Identifying Fullness Levels

   • ✓ Encourage pausing during meals to check fullness
   • ✓ Discuss the difference between satisfied and stuffed
   • ✓ Notice how different foods affect fullness
   • ✓ Practice stopping at level 6-7 even if food tastes good
   • ✓ Normalize that sometimes we eat past comfortable fullness

4. Address Non-Hunger Eating

   • ✓ When your teen wants to eat at level 8-10, ask what they're really hungry for
   • ✓ Help identify emotions like boredom, stress, or loneliness
   • ✓ Suggest non-food activities for meeting those needs
   • ✓ Allow that sometimes we eat for pleasure without hunger
   • ✓ Distinguish between emotional eating and problematic patterns

5. Create Regular Eating Opportunities

   • ✓ Aim to eat every 3-4 hours
   • ✓ Prevent getting to level 1-2 (ravenous)
   • ✓ Plan meals and snacks around your teen's schedule
   • ✓ Keep emergency snacks available for unexpected hunger
   • ✓ Adjust timing based on your teen's natural rhythm

6. Handle Challenges to the Hunger Meter

   • ⚠️ If your teen has suppressed hunger cues (from dieting), recognize this takes time to rebuild
   • ⚠️ If your teen consistently overeats, explore what's interfering with cue recognition
   • ⚠️ If your teen resists using the meter, don't force it—model it instead
   • ⚠️ If medical conditions affect hunger, work with healthcare providers
   • ⚠️ If your teen is in eating disorder recovery, follow professional guidance

Critical Process: Supporting Healthy Sleep

Purpose

To help your teen get adequate, restorative sleep which supports physical health, mental well-being, academic performance, and healthy eating patterns.

Prerequisites

• Understanding of teen sleep needs (8-9+ hours)
• Awareness of circadian rhythm shifts during adolescence
• Willingness to adjust family routines and expectations
• Basic understanding of sleep disruptors

Actionable Steps

1. Assess Current Sleep Patterns

   • ✓ Ask your teen when they last felt rested
   • ✓ Track how many hours of sleep they're actually getting
   • ✓ Identify barriers to adequate sleep (homework, activities, screens)
   • ✓ Notice patterns in sleep quality and mood
   • ✓ Discuss your own sleep habits as a family

2. Establish a Sleep Schedule

   • ✓ Aim for consistent bed and wake times, even on weekends
   • ✓ Work backward from required wake time to determine bedtime
   • ✓ Account for the 8-9 hour sleep need (more for athletes)
   • ✓ Build in wind-down time before bed
   • ✓ Be realistic about what's achievable given your family's schedule

3. Create a Wind-Down Routine

   • ✓ Start the routine about an hour before bedtime
   • ✓ Include calming activities (reading, stretching, music)
   • ✓ Make the routine consistent and predictable
   • ✓ Avoid stimulating activities during wind-down
   • ✓ Allow your teen input on what activities feel relaxing

4. Address Sleep Disruptors

   • 🔑 Remove screens from the bedroom or establish a charging station elsewhere
   • 🔑 Reduce blue light exposure in the evening (apps, glasses)
   • 🔑 Assess caffeine intake and timing (half-life is 5-6 hours)
   • 🔑 Avoid alcohol and cannabis before bed
   • 🔑 Create a dark, cool, uncluttered sleep environment

5. Support Natural Rhythms

   • ✓ Recognize that teens' circadian rhythms shift during puberty
   • ✓ Understand that your teen may naturally be tired later than you
   • ✓ Don't shame your teen for sleeping late on weekends
   • ✓ Work with, not against, your teen's biological clock when possible
   • ✓ Advocate for later school start times if this is a community issue

6. Handle Sleep Challenges

   • ⚠️ If your teen can't fall asleep after 25-30 minutes, have them get up
   • ⚠️ If you suspect a sleep disorder, consult a sleep specialist
   • ⚠️ If anxiety interferes with sleep, address the underlying issue
   • ⚠️ If your teen resists sleep boundaries, explore what's behind the resistance
   • ⚠️ If medication is being considered, explore non-pharmaceutical options first

Critical Process: Encouraging Joyful Movement

Purpose

To help your teen develop a positive relationship with physical activity that supports well-being without being tied to weight loss or appearance goals.

Prerequisites

• Understanding that exercise doesn't reliably lead to weight loss
• Awareness of the difference between joyful movement and exercise as punishment
• Willingness to support diverse forms of movement
• Recognition of barriers your teen may face

Actionable Steps

1. Examine Your Own Beliefs About Movement

   • ✓ Notice if you link exercise to weight or appearance
   • ✓ Reflect on messages you received about physical activity
   • ✓ Identify if you moralize exercise (good/bad)
   • ✓ Consider your own relationship with movement
   • ✓ Separate movement from food compensation

2. Support Your Teen in Finding Enjoyable Activities

   • ✓ Expose your teen to diverse movement options
   • ✓ Follow your teen's interests and curiosities
   • ✓ Support trying new activities without pressure to continue
   • ✓ Recognize that preferences may change over time
   • ✓ Value enjoyment over intensity or duration

3. Remove Morality From Movement

   • ✓ Never comment on your teen's weight in relation to activity
   • ✓ Avoid praising exercise for burning calories
   • ✓ Don't frame movement as making up for food eaten
   • ✓ Celebrate what bodies can do, not how they look
   • ✓ Model that rest is as important as activity

4. Address Barriers to Movement

   • 🔑 If your teen feels self-conscious, find inclusive spaces
   • 🔑 If equipment doesn't accommodate their body, seek alternatives
   • 🔑 If your teen lacks confidence, start with low-pressure activities
   • 🔑 If access is limited, get creative with home-based options
   • 🔑 If your teen has disabilities, find adaptive resources

5. Watch for Signs of Unbalanced Exercise

   • ⚠️ Notice if your teen exercises when sick, injured, or tired
   • ⚠️ Observe if exercise interferes with social or family activities
   • ⚠️ Monitor if your teen is eating enough for their activity level
   • ⚠️ Watch for anxiety around missing workouts
   • ⚠️ Pay attention if exercise seems compulsive rather than joyful

6. Create a Movement-Friendly Environment

   • ✓ Make movement options accessible and visible
   • ✓ Model joyful movement yourself
   • ✓ Keep movement fun and social when possible
   • ✓ Celebrate effort and enjoyment over achievement
   • ✓ Support rest and recovery as part of movement

Critical Process: Navigating Social Media

Purpose

To help your teen develop critical consumption skills and healthy boundaries around technology and social media use.

Prerequisites

• Understanding of both benefits and risks of social media
• Willingness to learn about platforms your teen uses
• Openness to having non-judgmental conversations
• Commitment to modeling healthy tech habits

Actionable Steps

1. Educate Yourself About Platforms

   • ✓ Ask your teen to show you the apps and platforms they use
   • ✓ Learn about features, privacy settings, and content
   • ✓ Understand what your teen enjoys about each platform
   • ✓ Notice the types of content and influencers they follow
   • ✓ Experience the platforms firsthand to understand their appeal

2. Have Curiosity-Driven Conversations

   • ✓ Ask "Who are you following?" and "What do you like about them?"
   • ✓ Explore what your teen finds engaging or problematic
   • ✓ Discuss how certain content makes them feel
   • ✓ Share your own observations without judgment
   • ✓ Keep dialogue open and ongoing

3. Teach Critical Consumption Skills

   • ✓ Discuss how images are edited and filtered
   • ✓ Talk about the difference between highlight reels and real life
   • ✓ Question the accuracy of information found online
   • ✓ Explore how algorithms show more of what you engage with
   • ✓ Encourage questioning of "fitspiration" and diet culture content

4. Help Curate a Positive Feed

   • ✓ Encourage following diverse bodies and backgrounds
   • ✓ Suggest following accounts that align with your teen's values
   • ✓ Support unfollowing accounts that make them feel bad
   • ✓ Expand interests beyond body and food content
   • ✓ Celebrate when your teen makes positive changes to their feed

5. Establish Tech Boundaries

   • 🔑 Create device-free zones (bedroom, dinner table)
   • 🔑 Set times when devices are put away
   • 🔑 Encourage peer-to-peer agreements about offline times
   • 🔑 Model putting your own devices away
   • 🔑 Discuss what to do if boundaries are challenged

6. Use the Tech Meter

   • ✓ Introduce the 5-point scale for assessing tech use
   • ✓ Have your teen identify where they are regularly
   • ✓ Discuss how different levels feel
   • ✓ Set goals for where they'd like to be
   • ✓ Check in periodically about tech habits
   • ✓ Use the meter as a tool for awareness, not shame

Critical Process: Building Body Positivity

Purpose

To help your teen develop a more positive relationship with their body through practical strategies and mindset shifts.

Prerequisites

• Understanding that body image exists on a spectrum
• Willingness to examine your own body image
• Recognition that this is an ongoing practice, not a destination
• Commitment to modeling body acceptance

Actionable Steps

1. Examine Your Own Body Image

   • ✓ Notice how you talk about your body
   • ✓ Identify your own body-checking behaviors
   • ✓ Reflect on messages you received about appearance
   • ✓ Consider how your body image affects your parenting
   • ✓ Work on your own body acceptance alongside your teen

2. Reduce Body-Checking Behaviors

   • ✓ Do a 24-hour surveillance to increase awareness
   • ✓ Use the "stop technique" when you catch yourself body checking
   • ✓ Remove mirrors temporarily if needed
   • ✓ Redefine the narrative about your body
   • ✓ Ask for support from loved ones

3. Expand Your Definition of Beauty

   • ✓ Seek out diverse representations of bodies
   • ✓ Challenge narrow beauty ideals in media you consume
   • ✓ Celebrate bodies of all sizes, shapes, and abilities
   • ✓ Recognize beauty across cultures and ages
   • ✓ Value function and feeling over appearance

4. Diversify Interests and Identity

   • ✓ Encourage your teen to develop multiple interests
   • ✓ Support identities beyond appearance or athletics
   • ✓ Celebrate skills and qualities unrelated to body
   • ✓ Help your teen see themselves as multifaceted
   • ✓ Model having a rich identity yourself

5. Practice Micro-Goals for Body Image

   • ✓ Start with small, achievable goals (60 seconds of acceptance)
   • ✓ Focus on what the body can do, not how it looks
   • ✓ Celebrate small shifts in thinking
   • ✓ Use hopeful mindset language ("I'm open to trying")
   • ✓ Build on successes gradually

6. Respond to Body Image Concerns

   • ⚠️ When your teen says they feel fat, validate the feeling without agreeing
   • ⚠️ When asked "Am I fat?", affirm acceptance regardless of size
   • ⚠️ When your teen compares to others, discuss the reality of images
   • ⚠️ When your teen wants to change their body, explore underlying feelings
   • ⚠️ When body image seems very negative, consider professional support

Critical Process: Setting Healthy Boundaries

Purpose

To help your teen develop the skill of setting and maintaining boundaries that protect their values and well-being.

Prerequisites

• Understanding of your own core values
• Willingness to examine your boundary-setting patterns
• Recognition that boundaries protect values, don't control others
• Commitment to modeling healthy boundaries

Actionable Steps

1. Identify Your Core Values

   • ✓ Complete the values exploration exercise in Chapter 9
   • ✓ Reflect on what matters most to you as a parent
   • ✓ Consider what you want for your family relationships
   • ✓ Identify your values around body, food, and health
   • ✓ Notice when you're acting out of alignment with your values

2. Learn to Communicate Boundaries

   • ✓ Use the "When you [action], I feel [feeling], and hear in my mind [thought]" script
   • ✓ Practice stating boundaries clearly and confidently
   • ✓ Keep explanations brief to avoid loopholes
   • ✓ Accept that others may not like your boundaries
   • ✓ Remember that boundaries are about you, not controlling others

3. Practice Caring with Detachment

   • ✓ Listen to your teen's feelings without taking them on
   • ✓ Offer support without trying to fix or rescue
   • ✓ Stay present to their pain while maintaining your own well-being
   • ✓ Recognize you can't regulate another's emotions
   • ✓ Model that it's okay for others to have uncomfortable feelings

4. Address Your Own Boundary Challenges

   • 🔑 Notice if you have difficulty saying no
   • 🔑 Identify if you people-please at your own expense
   • 🔑 Reflect on patterns from your childhood around boundaries
   • 🔑 Work on dissolving your triggers
   • 🔑 Seek support if boundary-setting is very difficult

5. Support Your Teen's Boundaries

   • ✓ Respect your teen's "no" even when you don't like it
   • ✓ Help your teen identify their own values
   • ✓ Teach boundary-setting communication skills
   • ✓ Support your teen when others don't respect their boundaries
   • ✓ Model that it's okay to have boundaries with people you love

6. Handle Boundary Violations

   • ⚠️ When your teen's boundaries are crossed, support them in addressing it
   • ⚠️ When you cross your teen's boundaries, apologize and repair
   • ⚠️ When boundaries create conflict, hold to your values with compassion
   • ⚠️ When family members challenge boundaries, stay firm but kind
   • ⚠️ When boundaries feel impossible, seek professional guidance